Tuesday, March 1, 2011

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Couldn't think of a name, kinda out of it today. I'm grateful for spring break coming up next week, i will be away for ten days, no phone, no mails, nothing, just me and a few good books including school books (have two exams when i get back), doing a lot of cooking, not so much eating (i really do not like food sha, such a shame) and hopefully sneak in some fun somewhere in there.

How rude of me, HI GUYS. How are you all doing? Special shoutout to the new followers, i appreciate it. Which brings me to the start of this post....

I always feel bad, when i get people follow me after a Praise Thursday, cos i know on Monday i'm going to be talking about something bad and i imagine that they are always disappointed. I have this theory that my really good Christian followers pray to God on my behalf that if he were to come for me it will be on a Praise Thursday day so i don't miss Heaven.

I look horrible and i mean straight up ugly when i cry. I saw that face this morning and it instantly stopped me from crying. God forbid that anyone gets to see this face. I'm the kind who doesn't look so bad when i wake up in the morning, i don't look bad when i'm angry unlike my mom and my two siblings(you do not want to see this face, again straight up ugly) and i don't look bad when i'm sad/sullen(my other sister, just mad ugly) so it was a shock to me men. Another reason why no one will be in the room with me when i'm delivering, no jokes.

Another Pastor told my mom i'm getting married this year - 4th person in 6months. I'm officially scared. My poor mother, i can't wait to relieve her of this stress, its not been an easy year for her so far and i can only just watch. God please lift her load. I and my siblings have lived on the benevolence of people, strangers and friends alike for 7 months now. I think we have maxed out gan. Again Thank you so much, i appreciate you.

So i was mad sexually frustrated last week, like it was horrible. I was ready to jump anyone that was willing. Which reminds me, I don't know that i have the strength to stay celibate if BB and i are in the same place guys. You know how it is in long distances, you go visit and stay with him/her. I need to stay celibate and yet we have to see, so how does this work? Our physical thing is as strong as the relationship we have if not stronger. O i got to see him for a couple hours this weekend and i finally got kissed after 7months, it was wonderful and i can say unequivocally that i am an awesome kisser, top ten in the business really, lol. Right there was ready to strip by the way. So any pointers on how to stay celibate guys?

My friend told me the other day "I have accepted the situation". For some reason that meant a lot to me. It wasn't that there was a need for approval, but there was a need for acceptance, that even though i might be doing the wrong thing and knowing that all you want is to protect me from any hurt, you can still just accept me and the situation.

I do the ultimate most guys, like i go far and beyond for the ones i love. I make it happen, employ all my resources(mostly human resources)....oooo quick sidebar - I know people, who know people, who know people, as in, i can't shout(Thank YOU so much). In any case, i wondered yesterday if i was this way because i want to be needed, and hoping that whoever i help feels indebted to me forever and remains loyal, like i'm buying their affection you know. This is totally rhetorical by the way, so ignore.

If only i were able to fix my problems, like i am able to fix/solve everybody else's problem. I need a miracle before Thursday and no one to turn to. God please send me a divine helper.

I wondered why i had so many bbm contacts and only talk to like 5, until yesterday when i needed my Jand connects. I literally woke people up to help me and was able to figure it out. Never cut ties guys, except you totally have to.

I have cut all connections with my dad, such a shame but it is what it is.

Thats about it guys, wishing you a blessed rest of the week. Enjoy the song below



P.S I LOVE YOU

16 comments:

  1. I'll be praying for u... wish I had pointers on how you can stay celibate...

    You will be fine sha

    Have an awesome month

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  2. hehehehehhe...I love you already!!! LDR uhm? God help you with that celibacy ish sha! Talk it over with BB and make sure you are on the same page on that issue, otherwise, you are on a loooong thing.
    Oh! hoe right you are about not deleting contacts!!!

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  3. Lol sorry no pointers for celibacy here. But I guess I can claim yearly celibacy for the period I'm away from the boyfie..yes? no? oh wareva lol

    Yes u have my contact and u dnt use it...dnt mind me I'm sooo horrible with keeping in touch X_X but trust me once spring comes u'll see mre of me!!!

    PS: I love uuuuuu mama! Stay strong!

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  4. hmmmm...celibacy? girl i did it for a yr and i almost gouged my eyes out! no pointers..just pray and focus on doing wat u love the most!

    hugs! just because!

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  5. You need God's grace cos what works for me might not work for you. Ask him to give you personalized pointers.

    http://lifethroughomaseyes.blogspot.com

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  6. You get down on your knees...when you feel like getting on top of him or vise-versa...you get down on your needs and pray for strength

    We are humans..so that is our saving grace...but its only to an extent.

    So you sud first remind urself why you are celibate. If its for religious reasons...then you have to weigh if you love God more than your body or not.

    If you decide you love God more...then whenever u feel horny...put that body on a FAST!!! then pray. God would give you strength to overcome.

    Its difficult...but its possible like HE said in his word...he will not give you any temptation that you cannot overcome.

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  7. It is well. God would help you with whatever you set your mind to do!

    Whats your email? I have a word to share with you

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  8. Hii, been reading ur blog for a long time but I never actually comment. Js wanted to say u gimme strength, like sometimes i read ur posts and I get reassured about God working in my life, God bless you 5000 times over. :)

    Abt the celibacy thing, em, maybe js try to remind urself abt why ure abstaining? that may help, it helps me.

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  9. @Harry - Thank you so much and have a great month as well

    @Honey Dame - :) thanks dear and will do, we have talked but i guess just have to make it happen'

    @Miss Enigma - lol, yes you can and lol, looking forward to the spring then. Love you too babe

    @Just Toluwa - lol @ almost gouged eyes out. will do and thanks, hugs right back

    @Oma -You are right and will do, thanks a lot.

    @Nutty J - Thank you darling, my fear is that its ok when we are apart but when we are together, will my mind remember and say ok lets stop and lets pray. I am praying and i hope i can.

    @Anonymous - Amen. and it is nifemioyedele@hotmail.com

    @Olawunmi - awww thank you so much, AMEN and God Bless you too. And will do, thanks

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  10. Hmmm 'How to stay Celibate'.....

    Just like Olawunmi said, remember why you are abstaining in the first place AND pray for strength (my personal secret)

    Always good to read from you, it's like reading the things I'm too lazy or scared to write about myself

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  11. Didnt quite notice the difference between Thursday and Monday posts until you mentioned it. What counts is that you make out time to praise God no matter what...

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  12. Lol. Don't worry, we can handle the Monday ranting. Err, i've got no ideas on the celibacy oh, although i'm a pro at it (part of the reason is the lack of opportunity/LDR) lol!

    Err, sorry about your dad

    Adiya

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  13. Don't sweat the contrast between Monday and Praise Thursday. May the Lord God continue to be your strength. May he only comeback on a praise Thursday:) Amen. Enjoy spring break and getting the studying in...Haha at looking straight up ugly when you cry. I guess we all can't cry like Halle Beryy. Oh well. By God's grace your tears will turn to those of joy. Amen. Hia at getting married this year. Na wa. Just don't forget to send moi an invite:) May God continue to provide for your entire family. E go better..Per being sexually frustrated, sheet, I've been that way for almost..... I swear, God is the only one that has been strengthening me. Sigh. I'm so grateful. Ditto the sentiments of others that say examine why you're choosing to remain celibate. May God strengthen you sweets. Si se puele... Hear hear to all you said about doing the ultimate for peeps and wondering about why you actually doing that. It's just weird to think about at times...chuckling at only talking to 5 contacts. I agree about the getting rid of contacts comment. Too true...I'm sorry about the situation with your dad. That sucks...

    May God send you that divine helper in Jesus name. ((hugs)) missy.

    Shadenonconformist

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  14. @dizzydami - Thank you dear, and awwww great minds

    @Rita - Thank you ma

    @Adiya -Thank you ma and lol @ being a pro at it.

    @Shade - I appreciate you darling. Amen and thank you

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  15. hun.......don't worry....it will all happen in good time. I can't say why nig pastors make promises, God knows best. Just do your best and enjoy the process of now.......till he comes....

    Re BB, you need to speak to him, is the relationship purely just physical? I'm afraid I don't have any answers - kinda like blind leading the blind. Stay strong! x

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  16. @AO - Thanks darling. No its not and thanks will do

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